We sit across from one another at the Greasy Spoon diner, reaching over the table to touch hands, caressing thumbs with the tenderness of a violin player. We joke and laugh, we talk, we sit in pure adoration. At the start of it all, the perks of the situation swam happily in my mind. Like most modern women, I felt I only needed a man for one thing, and a coupled lifestyle was not that thing. There would be no awkward morning-afters, no constant phone calls or texts. He loved me and worshipped me and spoke of our future.
I know every inch of his face and he knows every inch of mine. If I had never let things progress, I wouldn’t feel the hurt tugging on my heartstrings when we needed to disguise our relationship or feel the jealousy when he went home to his wife, as he always did. I could have all the space I wanted and I would hear no complaints from his end. But what started out as a simple, no-strings-attached relationship (or at least the illusion of one) evolved into much more. Maybe it was the jolt of electricity we both felt when we first met and shook hands or maybe it was our mutual understanding of the other’s troubles. We became each other’s go-to when one of us needed support.
You’ll know him from the nice suit (that his wife bought him for Christmas), the tan lines from the wedding ring that now resides in his breast pocket, and the sob story about the overbearing, under-caring burden he voluntarily shackled himself to umpteen years ago.
Ladies, if you’re on the singles scene long enough, you’ll undoubtedly attract the attention of a married man or two.
(c) Mark Goulston Blog Author, you take an almost too extreme stand against affairs.
I have a very good reason for dating a married man...we're in love. That the wife has not to face questions of her neighbors?
Not quite perfect enough to immediately leave his wife and sweep you off the market so no other can have you, but perfect enough to be his mistress for like ever—or until his wife figures out he’s cheating—whichever comes first. Perhaps he’ll leave after his wife after she finds out about your affair and throws his crap out onto the front lawn, you know, kind of like quitting your job after you got fired. A man who spent months, perhaps years, deceiving the women he loved. Still, it’s great that you found someone who gives you exactly what you want. While indeed some women who sleep with married men end up catching feelings and wanting to have a “normal” relationship, it's not always done with cruel intentions.“The forbidden and the taboo is one of the biggest turn-ons for people.A car pulls up outside and warrants his cursory glance. The couple in the car comes inside and he follows their every move. He stares for a moment, then snatches his hands back from the table. But it still stings just as much as the first time we ran into a relative of his and I had to “hide behind the oranges” in the grocery store. We knew each other inside and out, our lives so intertwined we were hard to tell apart. 7 GIANT Clues Your Relationship Is Doomed But I didn’t count on the pitfalls of this type of relationship. I was jealous and angry and crazily in love, and at times, so hurt I could barely stand. He would tell me grand stories about how we’d be together full-time someday. A small part of me believed him, but the rest of me knew better. We had such an intense connection that I was convinced living without him would be so much worse than enduring the agony of sharing my man. Our love for each other stayed strong, but the relationship had collapsed. The divot in his ring finger catches the light, reminding me of the torture I so often hide when we’re together. Like most everything else in my life, our relationship became punctuated by song lyrics I felt described our situation. I knew what I had to do, as much as I tried to ignore it. The chill had left the air and incoming Spring filled me with the power and motivation to do the hardest thing I knew I needed to do. We spoke sparingly over the next few days and it eventually faded to no communication.